Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Home management-

This is a topic that I am unfamiliar with. Yes, I am wife and mother, and that should include home manager. But let me tell you something… this is an area that has eluded me for some time. I should be the heart of the home, which is the plan that God had in mind when he made us. I am sad to say that I have been lacking in that area for far too long. As I go about my days, reeling from the dramatic changes that have happened in regards to my day to day life, I am drawn to one thing. I am called, at this time in my life to manage my home. I am always called to this, but at this time in my life I am called to learn what being a home manager means.

The desire of my heart is to be a good wife and mother. I want my son and husband to be content with their life at home. I want my husband to walk in to the home, and feel that he is laying aside the stresses of the day, not to pick up the stresses of home, but to rest, renew himself for the next day. I want my son to always have a smile in his eyes knowing that home is a place of peace. I never had that growing up, nor did my parents. It is a foreign concept to me. But it is a concept that I intend to bring to fruition in my life. I have no control over what my husband feels, but I do have control over the environment he spends his evenings and weekends in; that environment it going to be one of peace.

As my dear friend, and fellow stay at home mom said, “don’t complain to him, complain to your girlfriends, we know.” I want my husband to not feel overwhelmed by worries, by my concerns, nor do I want him to feel overwhelmed by my lack of responsibility both economically and emotionally. I am taking the bull by the horns as the saying goes. I am on the road to realizing the dream of a happy content home.

It is not to say that I have not been happy, but I realize that happiness, true happiness, only comes when one strives to better themselves. I am not talking about bettering myself according to earthly standards; I am talking about the bettering of the spiritual self. In the daily devotional, Grace for the Moment, by Max Lucado, February 22 has the scripture “We Christians actually do have within us a portion of the very thoughts and mind of Christ” 1 Corinthians 2:16 TLB. So, if I have the very mind of Christ within me, what is to say that I cannot better myself, cannot become more like him?

The healing of wounds is a big deal, not physical but emotional, the wounds of the spirit, we all have them. Those things that happened to us when we were young, that have helped to shape us into who we are today. God heals wounds, and sometimes he uses his people to do that. As I sit here thinking of my family, where we are at, both my new family and my childhood family, I realize that God has done a lot for us. He has healed many wounds, but there are some that need to be healed still. It is my prayer that both my husband and I, and other members of our family, can find healing in this new path that I am choosing to live.

It is not really anything different from the paths that I have traveled down in the past, but in each phase of life, the path takes on different overtones. Once the path was managing my life as a student, and now it is managing my life as wife and mother, and making things work for my family. Each step we take down our given paths leads us closer to God. I want to bring my family down that path. I pray that God takes the lead, shows me where to go, and that those in my family will be inspired to follow.

Being a home manager, wow, what an awesome responsibility; one that I am willing to take head on right now.

Friday, February 4, 2011

And so it goes

Life is crazy. My life is crazy, and wonderful. I lose one job only to discover the best and most tiring job ever. I mean look at that face. Granted he is two and he isn't always happy, but when he gets that smile you'll just melt I guarantee it. Next to my honey (aka: husband, Mike, slacker) that smile is my favorite person ever.

I have been struggling with this whole loosing my job situation, but I have recently come to terms with it, not just intellectually, but in my heart. I can truly say that things have taken a turn for the better. I am finally okay with losing my job because I know that God has bigger, better plans for my life. I won't even pretend to know what they are, But I do know one thing for sure, His plans are bigger and far better than anything I could ever hope for, I just need to trust Him.